Be Careful What You Wish For
In the beginning of the year when I first started to think about the Camino, I recognized that it was a symbol of my life. Before the walk was my life as a child, young woman, woman. After the walk woman, older woman, old woman. So I knew that as much as I was to walk toward something, I was walking away from something too.
The effects of Katrina on my life continued even 4 years later. When the storm hit the city of my birth it took from me my seemingly safe existence. There was a shift in reality here New Orleans and in me too: no present, just past and future. In order to move forward in my life, the treads that still connected me needed to be broken. I was to walk away from my life as I have known it since birth. All of my thoughts, feelings and beliefs that were no longer useful for me. Well so I thought. Those things would have been very easy for me since they exist inside of me.
I knew to begin the walk needed to be clean and clear from my life, as close to a newborn as I could come so I would have the room in my life for the present and future to grow and prosper.
The Camino is a tough taskmaster. She was to ask me to give up everything. Everything that tied me to my past. So I have moved my mother to Dallas, sold the family home, left a relationship, three cats and two dogs, my home, and all of my sources of income.
It seems like every time I think, Well this has to be it – it isn’t. I looked at myself in the mirror this morning (got my Camino haircut — could it be any shorter?) and I can’t even recognize who I am. My hair (what’s left of it) is turning gray; my face just looks, well, older. And so I continue the path to walking. My only hope and prayer at this point is that the walk itself is easier than the walk to prepare for the walk.
Bonnie was inducted into the Order of the Sword & Shield National Honor Society at St. John’s University, New York City for her work in Business Resilience.
Bonnie is Past Chair of the Association of Contingency Planners where she served for 6 years.
She is a proud native of New Orleans and has experienced what she calls, “The Katrina, Rita, Ike, Gustav, and BP Oil Spill” disasters first hand. She has had to learn how being resilience leaders and businesses to increased performance, achieve stronger relationships, and build mental toughness that we all need in today’s ever increasing busy world.
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