Take a Good Look
I was watching a rerun of the TV show Perception the other night and I was struck by the last scene. Here is what was said: “Take a good look at the person sitting closest to you, what do you see? A rival, a lover a friend? Would it surprise you to learn it’s mostly a fantasy?”
We get to know people by taking a few small clues that we have about them, and processing it all through a neural filter laden with our own personal biases. We rely on our minds to fill in the blanks of their identity. But who the people in our lives really are, their essence that’s in their brains not ours. The reality is until someone invents a way for us to literally plug in to the brains of another person we can never really know who they are. “
These words really struck me, as they point to a concept that has really made itself known in my life, what we perceive. As I look around to the people in my life, it has become more and more apparent how little I do know about them. I can only know what they allow me to learn. I take the data of their behavior and shared thoughts and feelings and compile that into a person, “Them”. But is that really “Them”? From this smattering of data, can I really know who someone is? Their essence?
I use my perception of them to guide and dictate all of my actions and thoughts towards “Them”. But how much do I really know? How could I know? Since all that I am exists within this human body of perception, could what I know really be true? My brain, takes these pieces of data and says this is real. This is true. But is it really? How can I ever think I could understand someone else, when I remain a mystery to myself? I am a very aware person, but I have often seen myself react or respond to circumstances in ways the confuse me. I hear myself asking, why did I do or say that? So I began to try to understand the mysteries within my own mind.
I quit asking who you are, and began with who am I? I slowly began to understand the aspects of the human brain and it’s interaction with the ”self”. I saw this brain really separated into many parts: the brain, thoughts, emotions and physical reactions to these thoughts.
What I have found is the brain (the grey cells that live in the head) is simply a computer, something that sorts data. Data in, data out – conclusion.
All we can do is arm ourselves with what we know to be true, our feelings. Love, anger, longing, happiness, fear, friendship these are our brain’s guidance system. It’s true north. And if we can manage to trust them, they can usually help us find what we are looking for.
Bonnie was inducted into the Order of the Sword & Shield National Honor Society at St. John’s University, New York City for her work in Business Resilience.
Bonnie is Past Chair of the Association of Contingency Planners where she served for 6 years.
She is a proud native of New Orleans and has experienced what she calls, “The Katrina, Rita, Ike, Gustav, and BP Oil Spill” disasters first hand. She has had to learn how being resilience leaders and businesses to increased performance, achieve stronger relationships, and build mental toughness that we all need in today’s ever increasing busy world.
Latest posts by Bonnie Canal (see all)
- WE CARE! Team: Answer these 5 Questions to Build Better Relationships - February 14, 2019
- WE CARE! Team: Building a Better Tomorrow by Taking Actions Today. - February 13, 2019
- Sunday Morning Affairs - February 13, 2019